“Curse of Saintvicious” Claims Yet Another CLG Jungler
— January 8, 2014The infamous Curse of Saintvicious struck again last Friday when Marcel “dexter1” Feldkamp was deported back to Europe due to immigration issues, two weeks before the beginning of LCS. The Curse, a well-known superstition in the LoL community, allegedly forbids Counter Logic Gaming from having a competent jungler over an extended period of time.
“I hoped that, with the acquisition of Dexter, we had finally broken the Curse,” stated CLG owner George “HotshotGG” Georgallidis. “I guess it’s back to the spinning wheel.”
According to legend, evil warlock Brandon “Saintvicious” DiMarco cast the eponymous hex on the NA team in response to being benched. It is rumored that in order to channel the potent and powerful incantation, Saintvicious had to sacrifice his hairline and his ability to obtain the Baron buff.
According to eyewitness sources, Dexter was last seen driving a boat into a hurricane, and rumor has it that he is currently working as a lumberjack.
This is not CLG’s only encounter with malevolent hexes: in 2012, an agricultural wizard punished Doublelift for his hubris, cursing him to do nothing but farm in all of his games.