Esports Express

Internal Disciplinary Measures

 
An escaped lore writer who fled the structure known as “the enclosure” was a key witness in helping police piece Riot Games’ actions during its criminal spree. She claims that Riot subjected Deficio to “internal disciplinary measures” following a breach of Riot’s draconian rules governing its captives.

According to this writer, troops from the Fine-ance Department roam the halls of Riot, wearing police hats and cardboard boxes painted to look like cop cars. Allegedly, these zealous Riot employees would follow suspected wrong-doers, shouting “wee woo wee woo” until the perpetrator stops and they are hauled off to the Hallowed Halls of Judgement.

Internal disciplinary measures take things to another level. According to our inside source, Riot Deficio had to deal with the following punitive measures:

• If a Riot employee said, “loser says what?,” Deficio had to say “what” and everyone will laugh at him for being a loser.

• He would have had to spend time with Krepo for the Summer Split after Week 4

• Riot employees were allowed to call him “Defici-no” and he had  to act like it’s an incredibly funny joke.

 
 
 

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